My gig had been canceled. The venue had strangely booked it at the wrong time. We had all shown up to play and were sent home until it was rescheduled. A little while later I got a text that we would be playing later that day at a different venue, a restaurant called Dine & Eat.
I read the reviews and they all said that Dine & Eat was one of the best restaurants around. The food was superb. I was still in my gig clothes and it was only a few hours until we played, so I thought I would go on down there and eat before we perform.
I walk in and see that the restaurant is set up similar to a hibachi. Diners' chairs are placed around a central area where someone else might stand. It was in between lunch and dinner, so it wasn't the least bit crowded in there. I was shown to a table and I sat down in one of the unusually high backed chairs. The chair suddenly tips back and I feel like I'm going to lose my balance.
I realize that the chair is meant to tip back. All of the chairs tip back until the diner is in a fully reclined position. It's then that I realize what makes this restaurant so unique. They only serve the most decadent foods - things like steak and lobster. The food is cut up into bite sized pieces before being served and it is placed upon a certain exposed area of the reclined patrons. The restaurant caters to heterosexual couples in which the man is reluctant to engage in that particular act and needs to be coaxed into doing it by having a delicious meal served on it. He is meant to eat it without using his hands and the woman can derive as much enjoyment as possible from his snorting and rooting. She doesn't eat.
I'm surprised that the reviews had neglected to mention how the food was served, only that it was very high quality. I'm so embarrassed to have booked a gig at the Lion's Den of restaurants and I hope it's not too late to cancel!
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